When you're the victim of it.

Putting the blame onto others, accusing, or even being hostile to another. Isn't that a normal thing to do when it comes to defending your pride, ego or even protecting yourself from the vulnerability. Makes you feel great isn't it? Superior. I do that too, all the time, especially when it comes to protecting my pride from being trampled on and losing out. But I do hate it especially when I'm the victim of it. These "events" just makes you shut the hell up and never want to say a word or comment anymore.

1. Failure of coming to terms with ideas or suggestions. Heated argument especially with someone you're so damn close with. Feels like crap.

2. Being accused of ruining the computer when the younger dumb fuck sibling is too retarded-ly stupid to know how to fix the problem of the computer.

I've figured that sometimes the less you say something, could probably put you in a higher chance of "winning the case". But that's just not me, I don't back down even if it means losing out. See you at the end.

Remedy to problems like this - a glass of tropical fruit drink out of a can, a guitar to strum to the tune of Yellow by Coldplay.

Hope that good soul brings back that wallet of yours buddy. And to you, am up and running but I still miss you.

Restart

So here's the thing. I started a blog before, but somehow abandoned it after posting just one post. Then it somehow came into my realization again that I need to take down the minutes of my life. No other purpose or reason, its more to me looking back one day and telling myself "oh yea, this happened on this date". Memory more like it.

But somehow, sometimes things are best to be forgotten, no I'm not talking about forgetting the best time I had spending with you, those whacky midnight conversations i.e Fuhrer mommy and such, those little inexpensive outings, definitely not those. I was more to referring about the things you left hanging, a sudden change which I cannot cannot come to terms with. After all, those 3 words did make me melt until I realized you probably didn't mean it. To top it all, I don't think that it's even my fault if honesty had been taken place from the beginning. Worse part is that begging took place instead - like a dog, pleading that another chance is given. Face was thicker than the Great Wall of China or the Berlin Wall, humiliated, dented ego. As cliche as it may sound, this was because saya sayang kamu banyak but I don't think it's making any difference. Forget about it, move on yea? Better idea.

To grow up according to age. I don't think that's me. I am who I am and you (in general) wouldn't like it if changes has taken place because I'm not me. Period.

So let's hope that I'll constantly update this blog instead of abandoning it for the second time. Restart has taken place. Let's see the outcome. Till then.

*I still miss you*
*It's not intended for you to read it and I'm not seeking for attention, get that straight*